Geun-Hong Kim
Professor Jon Bahk-Halberg
Introduction to Academic Writing (1)
March 21, 2012
My Special Video Tapes
I have video tapes on which my mother recorded the Walt Disney Animated Classics series. These video tapes are very meaningful to me because they remind me of my mother's love. When I was young, my mother gave some video tapes. She wanted us to learn English so made us listen to the entire dialogue in English without any subtitle. However, we didn't have to listen to the movies to get the story line. We could figure out the plots roughly, just watching the images. Besides, they always have the same basic story and the plot of the story is very simple. Despite the language barrier, I love the video tapes. Cinderella in her blue dress with glass slippers was so beautiful, and Ariel, the little mermaid under the sea looked so fresh and full of energy. The characters in the films sang a lot of songs and I liked them all. The movies' stories and songs remain fresh in my memory until now. And I could know that because my mother loves us, she taped all the Disney movies. That's why these video tapes are so important to me.
The reason your video tapes are special to you is very touching. I like your discription of the video tapes. I can understand why you value them. However, adding more details about the tapes would have improved your paragraph. Your short discription does not provide sufficient information on your valuable possession.
ReplyDeleteIt seems that your special possession is not a Walt Disney Animated Classics series video but your mother's LOVE on you. I think that whenever you watch the video, you would recall your mother and love of your mother. Video tapes is just medium of your mother's love and devotion on you, I guess. I fully feel your heart that loves your mother in your essay.
ReplyDeleteGeun-Hong Kim
ReplyDeleteProfessor Jon Bahk-Halberg
Introduction to Academic Writing (1)
March 21, 2012
Final draft
My Special Video Tapes
I have video tapes on which my mother recorded the Walt Disney Animated Classics series. These video tapes are very meaningful to me because they remind me of my mother’s love. When I was young, my mother gave some video tapes which looked like blank tapes. She wanted us to learn English so made us listen to the entire dialogue in English without any subtitle. However, we didn’t have to listen to the movies to get the story line. We could figure out the plots roughly, just watching the images. Besides, they always have the same basic story and the plot of the story is very simple. Despite the language barrier, I love the video tapes. Cinderella in her blue dress with glass slippers was so beautiful, and Ariel, the little mermaid under the sea looked so fresh and full of energy. I also wanted to adventure with Robin Hood, steal from the rich to share with the poor and in particular, shoot arrows. The characters in the films sang a lot of songs and I liked them all. The movies’ stories and songs remain fresh in my memory until now. And I could know that because my mother loves us, she taped all the Disney movies. That’s why these video tapes are so important to me.