Sense Of Place
-Fitness Center-
200903390 HyunCheol CHO
I always go to fitness center close to my home for my health. I'm going to explain the sense of this place by three senses that people can feel, sense of sight, hearing and smell.
First, the senses of sight of fitness center are healthfulness, activeness and beauty. There are so many men who has a lot of muscles. Whenever they raise up barbells, their huge muscle and blood vessel wiggle like a snake. And people in fitness center go around here and there quickly to exercise more. I could see their afterimage in place they pass by. And there are many women who has smooth body which is worked out by exercise. I'am ashamed to say that I can feel the beauty of women's body in there.
Second, I can hear many various sound in the health center. A main sound is clinking sound which occur because of barbells and sport outfits. And there are also breathless sound of people who consume there almost energy. And there are loud and powerful house music sound in the health club. I can gain power and energy for exercise in rapid and intense sound of house music which make my heartbeat fast.
Third, the sense of smell of fitness center is very complicated. Almost people guess that the smell of fitness center is awful and disgusting. Yeah, it's right partially that fitness club stinks. Fitness stinks because there are many people who sweat and it is a sealed place. But, you know, this awful sweat smell becomes catalyst and dynamic force of exercise when I'm exhausted. A complex of acrid smell of metal barbell and smell of sweat make me active. So I hate the smell of fitness center but at the same time love the smell of fitness center.
I like how you seperated the discriptive paragraphs into three sections. It was much easier to follow the main points of each of your paragraphs.
ReplyDeleteDividing each senses into different paragraphs seems cool. As you wrote I could see the fitness center in my mind and that's what professor talked about. Your humorous descriptions also make the paragraphs interesting.
ReplyDeleteThe second draft of 'Sense of Place'
ReplyDeleteSense of Place - Fitness Center -
I always go to fitness center close to my home for my health. I'm going to explain the sense of this place by three senses that people can feel, sense of sight, hearing and smell.
First, the senses of sight of fitness center are healthfulness, activeness and beauty. There are so many men who has a lot of muscles. Whenever they raise up barbells, their huge muscle and blood vessel wiggle like a snake. And people in fitness center go around here and there quickly to exercise more. I could see their afterimage in place they pass by. And there are many women who has smooth body which is worked out by exercise. I'am ashamed to say that I can feel the beauty of women's body in there.
Second, I can hear many various sound in the fitness center. A main sound is clinking sound which occur because of barbells and sport outfits. And there are also breathless sound of people who consume there almost energy. And there are loud and powerful house music sound in the health club. I can gain power and energy for exercise in rapid and intense sound of house music which make my heartbeat fast.
Third, the sense of smell of fitness center is very complicated. Almost people guess that the smell of fitness center is awful and disgusting. Yeah, it's right partially that fitness center stinks. Fitness stinks because there are many people who sweat and it is a sealed place. But, you know, this awful sweat smell becomes catalyst and dynamic force of exercise when I'm exhausted. A complex of acrid smell of metal barbell and smell of sweat make me active. So I hate the smell of fitness center but at the same time love the smell of fitness center.