It's my turn.
In honestly, I thought that I am really responsible & cheerful person. When I was a freshman in 2009, I always find other guys in other major to meet. Also I could not let go of my study. So when in the exam period I always keep study hard, so I could get the scholarship. But the reason why I entered the university, especially "Hankuk University of Foreign Study", was the only one. I just want go abroad and met many people as I can. So I selected here, and in 2009 I met many people who I want to follow or excited the passion and so on. And you might imagine that how I enjoy my university life in 2009. But in the army there was a turnaround. I could not spread my passion or feelings to other person at first, so I got cold feet. But time helped me cheer up, I rose my lank in there and that made me freer. And after finished the army service, I got many interesting days. Now I realize that I find myself in 2009. Because I joined some club that show foreigners around in Korea that help me remind my goal in here, and these time in midterm exam period also makes me getting tension that I know I'm the university student, not the soldier. And from now on, it's my turn to enjoy this university life. Not anymore protect the Country from North Korea.
You expressed your changes of feelings well on your writing, and it made the writing more interesting. Explaining your purpose and wants you had for entering HUFS was a good help for understanding your point. However, there were some misused words and grammer so that some sentences were a bit unclear. And I couldn't understand the sentence "But time helped me cheer up, I rose my lank in there and that made me freer.". If you modify some word mistakes and make the sentences more clear, I think your writing could be better! :)
ReplyDeleteIt's my turn
ReplyDeleteIn honestly, I thought that I am really cheerful and responsible person. When I was a freshman in 2009, I always found other guys in other major to meet. And I tried many affords to spread my human network as many as possible. And the reason why I entered the university, especially "Hankuk University of Foreign Study", was the only one. I just want go abroad and met many people as I can. So I choose here.
Also I could not let go of my study. So when in the exam period I always keep study hard, so I could get the scholarship. And I met many people who I want to follow or excited the passion and so on. So you might imagine that how I enjoy my university life.
But in the army there was a big turnaround. I could not reveal my passion or feelings to other person at first, so I got cold feet. But time’s going helped me cheer up, my lank in there got higher and that made me freer. And after finished the army service, I got many interesting days.
Now I realize that I find myself in 2009. Because I joined a club named “KR Buddy” that guide foreigners around in Korea that help me remind my goal in here, HUFS. And these time in midterm exam period also makes me getting tension that I know that I'm the university student, not the soldier. And from now on, it's my turn to enjoy this university life. Not anymore protect the Country from North Korea.